Memories
by captainofswans
Summary: The Sheriff's station has more memories linked to it than Emma thought-some, she tried to hard to shove away, and are coming back to haunt her. (contains possible spoilers/spec for 4x06) ('Reasons to Smile' verse)


_A/N: (possible spoilers/spec) So, yet another spoiler picture gave me the feels. JMo tweeted a picture of Killian's hook on the rack beside Graham's jacket in the station, and I couldn't resist writing some Graham feels. Also, warning I watched TFIOS while writing this. It got real feelsy real fast._

_I hope this is okay—it's different than what I usually write._

_Regardless, enjoy!_

* * *

><p>It was another excruciatingly long day at the station. She wasn't surprised the town was so quiet. After the slew of villains they'd encountered, it was nice to have a bit of silence around Storybrooke.<p>

The rain pattered on the old windows, streaming down them as it poured. Emma hadn't seen it rain so hard in Storybrooke in a long time-not since she first arrived there.

As she finished up the last of her paperwork to do, she leaned back in her chair with a sigh. She smiled at the small picture frame on her desk, the picture of her and Killian on their wedding day. Then, there was the one of Liam and Henry posing with Nana by the water-a picture that took way longer to shoot than intended.

Still, it was a memory Emma adored.

Continuing to swivel her chair, she glanced at some of the other things in the station.

There were small mementos from just about everyone in town-David's sword hanging on the wall, a few drawings that both Liam and Neal drew over the years, Mary Margaret's birthday cards (from a few days ago)... It was weird that the station had turned into this physical scrapbook of their family.

It wasn't until she kept turning that she saw the lone jacket on the coat rack. Graham's. It was worn now, looking a lot rougher than it had in years past. No one had moved it or worn it since he left it there, but being right by the window didn't do it much good. The red on the back of the collar was still there, nearly as bright as it was when he wore the jacket. Graham's jacket was always one of her favorites.

God, she missed him.

Not in a true love sort of way, but more as a friend, as a short-lived love. She did love him, and she'd always hated herself for never letting him know that. He deserved that, at least.

_Thank you. I remember._

Emma knew Graham was something special, that he was in a true conflict with himself. The desolate, desperate way his eyes looked before he tried kissing her the first time. His blue, blue eyes were so warm, so kind-Emma had been told multiple times by her mother that he saved her from Regina's guards.

Graham had told her he liked rainy days-though, Emma wasn't surprised. There were a few times where the two would drive around Storybrooke to just get out on rainy days.

* * *

><p>"Emma, want to do something?" Graham asked, a smile wide on his lips.<p>

Emma raised a brow from her spot in the deputy's chair, smiling as she bit into her bear claw.

"What do you have in mind?" She asked, sitting up straighter.

"Why don't we go take a ride?" He smiled, "It's raining pretty hard, so there's not much else to do at the moment."

"You're kidding, right?" Emma snorted, "It's pouring. I'm not leaving this spot unless something's happening."

"C'mon, Emma-can't we have some fun?" He grinned, nudging her shoulder. She raised her eyebrow at him again, a chuckle escaping from her lips.

"What exactly are we going to do?"

"Just ride around. You won't get wet at all-it's just to get out of this stuffy station." He grinned, "Please?"

Those damn eyes. She couldn't handle them.

"Fine, fine, let's go." She smiled, slipping on her rainboots and hurrying to the rack to grab her raincoat. She was half-way through zipping it up by the time Graham was motioning for her to go first. She chuckled and ducked out, hurrying out to the sheriff's car. Emma shrieked as she scrambled to get into the car, panting as she slammed the door shut. Graham hurried in moments later, laughing his damn ass off.

"You're unbelievable." Emma panted.

"What? I don't believe that for a second." Graham grinned, turning the key as the car roared to life.

"So, where exactly are we going?" Emma asked, raising a brow.

"Anywhere you want. It's on Madame Mayor's dime, not mine." Graham spoke with a smirk, making Emma smile. The damn woman took her son-well, she'd take her gas.

"Perfect. Go to the town line." Emma smiled.

"All the way across town?"

"Yep."

"If the lady insists." Graham chuckled, slipping the car into gear and starting down the road.

It was silent for only a few moments before Graham spoke up again.

"So, how's Henry?"

Henry. Right. Her son. Jesus, she still couldn't process it.

"He's good, I think." Emma shrugged, "I don't know-Regina doesn't like me seeing him."

"Oh." Graham replied, "He was really excited to find you, Emma."

"I know... He told me."

"I think-"

Graham had to slam to a stop as Regina stood in the middle of the road, an umbrella over her head. Emma rolled her eyes-it felt like she was caught by her parents trying to sneak out.

"Oh, for god's sake." She grumbled.

"It's okay-I'll go talk to her, tell her we're patrolling." Graham smiled, putting the car in park before stepping out into the monsoon.

Emma watched the two talk, standing uncomfortably close to each other.

"Ugh." She mumbled under her breath as Regina pulled Graham close. She was so obnoxious.

Moments later, Regina was walking back to the sidewalk, and Graham was scrambling to get back into the car.

"Are we clear to breathe?" Emma asked, causing Graham to chuckle.

"She wants us to stay at the station today. Regina said we're better to stay there."

"Of course we are." Emma sighed as Graham turned the car around.

"Hey," Graham smiled, nudging her shoulder, "We'll make our own fun at the station, okay?"

Emma couldn't help but smile back at him.

"Okay." Emma smiled.

* * *

><p>Tears. She felt tears. No, no, no. She wasn't going to cry over something that happened years upon years ago.<p>

"Love, I'm here!" Killian called out as he and the boys burst through the door.

Emma hurried to compose herself, failing to do so before Killian was at her side.

"Emma, love, what's wrong?" He spoke softly.

"Nothing, I'm fine." Emma sniffled.

"Emma, come with me." Killian whispered, gently lifting her from her seat, bringing her over to the small, private room at the back of the station.

"Boys, stay right here. We'll be right back." Killian promised, to which Henry nodded.

"Emma, love, what's wrong?" Killian asked, flipping on the light and closing the door.

"I'm fine." She sniffled, but she couldn't close her eyes as tears fell. She couldn't, because all she saw was Graham.

"Emma, I know you're hurt. What happened?"

"Graham." She finally spoke in broken syllables.

"Graham?"

She shook her head, viciously wiping at her tears.

"He was the sheriff, before me. He was my best friend, and he was taken from me." Emma cried, her breath catching in her throat. She covered her mouth as she cried, moving her head as Killian pulled her close to his chest.

"Emma, love..." Killian whispered, rubbing the back of her head gently.

"I miss him so bad, Killian." Emma sobbed.

"That's alright, love. It's okay." Killian spoke softly, "It's okay."

Emma couldn't keep her tears in any longer, the sobs wracking her body.

"Emma." Killian whispered, "Emma, it's okay."

Emma couldn't stop the force in her body that was causing her to cry so terribly.

"Killian, make it stop." She sobbed, her breaths catching in her throat.

"Emma, just breathe." Killian whispered, "Breathe, love."

Emma shook her head against Killian's chest, tears still falling from her eyes.

"Let's get you home, love."

"But, the station-"

"I'll come back as soon as I know you're okay." Killian whispered, gently tugging away and taking her head in his hand.

Emma nodded, leaning into Killian's embrace again. He gently walked her out to the main part of the station, causing Henry and Liam to look up.

"Mom, are you okay?" Henry asked, rising to his feet. All Emma could do was close her eyes and shake her head.

"Killian?"

"She's upset-let's go home, boys." Killian spoke softly, continuing to hold her close to his chest.

"Want me to drive?" Henry offered.

"Please, lad." Killian nodded as the four made their way out the door. Emma simply clung to Killian, her chest hurting from all of the sobs.

Killian helped her into the car, sitting beside her in the backseat and pulling her to his chest.

The drive back to their house was absolutely terrible. Emma couldn't stop herself from crying, and she knew Henry was incredibly worried about her.

Killian opened the door and slipped out of the car, gently lifting Emma out of the car. Emma knew he was being over-dramatic by carrying her bridal-style into house, but she couldn't complain.

"Mommy, are you okay?" Liam asked as Killian laid her on the couch and sat beside her, pulling her into his arms.

"She's a bit upset right now, lad." Killian spoke softly, "She'll be alright, lad. She just needs some time."

"Liam, why don't we go play with Nana in your room? We can build a fort." Henry spoke with a small smile, pressing a kiss to the top of Emma's head before following Liam to his room.

"Emma, love, can you say something?"

"I'm sorry."

"Oh, love, that's not what I meant." Killian whispered, gently brushing her tears away with the pads of her fingers.

"I shouldn't be crying this hard." She spoke in broken breaths.

"It's alright to cry, love." Killian spoke with a sweet smile, "Do you need to talk about him? This Graham?"

"I don't want you to feel-"

"Love, if you need to speak about him, please. I'll listen. I promise." Killian whispered, tucking some curls behind her ear.

"I love you, Killian." Emma whispered.

"I love you, too, Emma." Killian replied, "Now, tell me about Graham. Did you ever kiss him?"

Emma couldn't help but giggle at that, nodding her head.

"Oh, bloody hell."


End file.
